Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.-- Mark Twain

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.-- Mark Twain

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.-- Mark Twain

We are called the nation of inventors. And we are. We could still claim that title and wear its loftiest honors if we had stopped with the first thing we ever invented, which was human liberty.-- Mark Twain

The citizen who thinks he sees that the commonwealth's political clothes are worn out, and yet holds his peace and does not agitate for a new suit, is disloyal; he is a traitor.-- Mark Twain

Mark Twain's answer to a would-be writer:"Young Author"--Yes, Agassiz does recommend authors to eat fish, because the phosphorus in it makes brain. So far you are correct. But I cannot help you to a decision about the amount you need to eat--at least not with certainty. If the specimen composition you send is about your fair usual average, I suggest that perhaps a couple of whales would be all you would want for the present. Not the largest kind, but simply good middling-sized whales.-- Mark Twain

What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce. -- Mark Twain

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.-- Mark Twain

It ain't the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand.-- Mark Twain

'In God We Trust.' I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.-- Mark Twain